The Importance of Touch

 

I think so many take for granted how important touch is to people. Covid has certainly destroyed touch with all the rules and now habit of social distancing. Masks keep people from seeing expressions. You can no longer share smiles. I'm over the whole mask thing and only wear one where I am absolutely required to do so, such as a doctor's office or hospital. Lack of touch is the worst part of dealing with covid on a daily national level. I was recently hospitalized with covid and I can say from experience that I longed for hugs and touches from my husband and the rest of my family. I even cried some days and expressed to the nurses how much I just wanted to see and hold my husband's hand. Once my husband insisted on them moving me to a room with a window where he and my kids and grandkids could see me and we could talk on the phone, it helped my spirits so much. It still wasn't touch but it made me fight to get better. The nursing homes did a disservice to the elderly when they refused to let their families into see them and touch them. The employees could come and go yet family couldn't. By the way, it was medical staff that brought covid to the nursing home patients! --Every single time! If they were or are worried about covid spreading, they would pay nurses and staff hazard pay and lock them in the facility until danger has passed. Because of not being allowed to see their families, many of the elderly fell into deep depressions and quite frankly, gave up. This harmed their physical well being as well. 

Touch helps both the physical and mental state of anyone or even any animal. A calming and soothing voice also helps. It is seen in the NICU when nurses are caring for newborn babies. It is seen at the vet as they talk to the animals and pet them gently or hold them. These days doctors have discovered that touch is so important that when a new mom first delivers, they immediately place the newborn on the mom's chest for skin to skin contact. Yet, hospitals and nursing homes are keeping people from this very important asset!

IT STINKS! And I might even go so far as to say it's wrong. My husband, who had just gotten over covid himself, (so wasn't in danger) wasn't allowed in my room to help me make decisions about my health choices yet the hospital chaplain got to be in there. Bob was furious. He hadn't set eyes on me since leaving me at the ER 3 days earlier and was only being allowed to see me on a zoom call. I looked bad and could barely speak. There is just something wrong with that scenario!! 

My point is that touch is IMPORTANT! Hug and touch your loved ones daily! Never miss an opportunity because it's more therapeutic than most people realize. Scientists have proven that petting an animal brings joy and happiness to those who partake. How much more important is touch between people?! 

Life as a Mule

 

Hello there! This is my first time blogging since my hospitalization from Covid and nearly dying during. I hope it will make sense since I still have a bit of trouble gathering my thoughts and articulating them. My short term memory has gotten much better but is not 100%. 

I chose the title of this post because I am apparently stubborn as a mule when it comes to doing what the Lord wants. This is not the first time He has brought me to the brink of death to get my attention and move me in the right direction.

 I have been quite backslidden the past 2 years or so, especially in attitude which then effected my works. I admit that I have not witnessed as I should and allowed myself to become jaded and cynical when it comes to dealing with flawed people. I felt I wasn't having an impact as a pastor's wife no matter how hard I tried during the last 6 years of our ministry. The last 2 years my effort became progressively less as I allowed myself to become discouraged at seeing what I felt was no influence or impact in others. Yes, I know that God only asks for faithfulness not success. I also know that you cannot make people do the right things or care or make right choices in their lives but you hope that as you try hard to live Christ-like before them and to teach them God's Word that something will impact. I know that this is something that most people in ministry struggle with and I am watching it play out as a layperson and not the one in charge currently. Even large churches are struggling to see pews full, get volunteers to commit to anything or help in any way and seeing the faithful few become battered and worn out. It has been somewhat comforting to know that it wasn't just us and that most churches are struggling. I suppose it's a sign of the times. It's not that the world cares nothing about God and His Word, but it seems many Christians do not care either. It's a "me first world" and "my wants world" and that has changed the church world which in turn has allowed our country as a whole to turn their backs on God. 

OK back to my title. I didn't even realize I was being a mule and so backslidden in my work for the Lord. I only knew I was exhausted and feeling like it was all fruitless. When you're heart turns negative and cynical you begin backing up and no longer being prompted by the Holy Spirit or you start ignoring the Holy Spirit. I know now that's what I was doing. When God has you teetering between life and death and you are coming to grips with the possibility of leaving this world and your loved ones, it gets real, quickly! I had peace once I decided I was OK with dying or living which ever God chose. When He decided to miraculously heal starting the next day, I knew once again that God had a plan and purpose for my life. As I said, He has brought me to this point before and I have struggled for many years wondering if I was doing His purpose and plan. Going forward I no longer wonder. I am positive that I am to share my healing story and tell others about the saving grace of God through His son, Jesus. I am also going to try to stop being a mule. At least about listening to the Holy Spirit. Being stubborn has it's place. It also means I will not back up from standing on God's Word or telling others what it says. It also gave me determination in that hospital bed to set goals and fight to go home to my family. I did whatever the doctors told me I should to gain strength; eat, rest, sleep on my stomach to help my lungs. Doctors and even nurses told me that my goals weren't attainable. (It was to go home by that weekend) I even resided myself to what they were explaining to me and that it would not be until the next week. However, I DID go home on that Saturday! The doctor admitted it was miraculous and said I was the first from their hospital to be so close to death and then recover and was amazed at how quickly. I told her it was God healing. It was all Him. 

Sometimes we wonder why God uses such drastic measures to reach some of us. I believe He does whatever He has to do. I also believe that sometimes it has less to do with us and more to do with those around us. It helped my husband and kids pray like they never had before and it taught them and my grandkids to trust God. And I will continue to use my experience to help to strengthen their minds and hearts toward trusting God no matter what God chooses. There is so much peace in this and ultimately we get no choice anyway. Why fight God? Obey Him, and have peace in trusting Him. 

Hopefully this made sense. It took quite awhile to write as I tried to focus my thoughts. 

The Everyday Doesn't Have to be Disney World

 

It's been a few weeks since I have had a chance to post. Life has been super busy! Today I want to talk about traps that parents and grandparents fall into in their thinking. For the past 15 years or more, I've observed and even caught myself getting caught up in the fast pace, create grand experiences for the kids so everything is an adventure and fun and exciting. We think this needs to be done on a very regular basis. I'm not sure if it's because kids today are so easily bored because they have so much access to stimuli or if it's social media creating doubt and guilt in us so that we feel pressure to compete with what everyone else is doing. For me, I think it started maybe because I don't get to see my grandkids in person on a regular basis. Now that we have moved, that has changed with one set of kids. 

What I want everyone who reads this to realize is that everyday doesn't have to be Disney World fun. Simple everyday time spent playing with them is every bit as important as these grand, exciting experiences. Kids today have so much that many of them don't even know what they want if you ask them an idea for a present. They all seem to need to be constantly entertained by the adults in their lives. All over social media memes go around telling us to not purchase toys or games or gifts but rather give gift cards to have experiences. In other words, get them passes to the theme park or movies or mini golf or zip lining, etc. Well, I think we may be doing a disservice to these kids by doing that. Sure, if they are children that have never gotten to go experience something fun like that, then by all means help them go have a great experience once in awhile. On the other hand, the more they experience, the more bored they become with life. They are going to always be looking for the next big exciting thing to do. 

My own children didn't need me to play with them all the time. Neither did adults constantly need to entertain me. Making them play on their own forces them to use their imaginations and pushes their creativity. It makes them self-sufficient. Children are pretty resilient and will figure out how to get something done if allowed the time to do so. How do you think so many learn to build makeshift ladders to reach the candy or toy or game they want?

Now back to the grandiose experiences, I am almost 55 years old and when I look back on my life and my childhood the things I miss most are not the great experiences but the little everyday things. I miss playing with my cousins. I miss them. I miss spending time with them. The everyday fun we had has burned memories into my brain that I still long for. Yes, I have had some great experiences in my time, but those are not what comes to my mind first. We played more Army and S.W.A.T (using whiffle ball bats and sticks as guns!) and cowboys and Indians than any group of cousins alive. Of this I am sure! We played and we played hard! Life was great!  We played every kind of ball imaginable and we made up games to play together. We played in the dirt and the mud and swam in the river and never felt we were deprived because life was so much fun!   Playing anything together was fun! We had rope swings and tree houses and we also had grapevines to swing on, too!  The girls played dress up and house and we played in a net hammock for hours! We went sledding in the winter, built snow forts, built forts and club houses out of cinder blocks, climbed trees, pretended to be in a singing band and sang at the top of our lungs. We spent tons of time in the woods and in the fields catching grass hoppers and having water fights and when my kids were young they got to do the same things. My point is, the movies, parks, theme parks, traveling to other states, zoos and zip lining experiences were few and far between. And guess what, those few experiences are not the things that I miss. They are not what I look back on and think made my growing up life awesome. It was the time spent living everyday with those I loved. I had great cousins on both sides of my family and both sides of my family were inner twined because my mom and her siblings grew up with my dad and his siblings. My mind is flooded with spending the night at my cousin's houses or with my grandparents. My life was full of love and laughter and I had no doubt I was loved even when I messed up. No one can ask for more than that! 

Fun and laughter can come right at home in the house or in the yard! This is what makes a memorable life!

Just something to think about. I shared my heart and my past today. Hope it makes you think and is a blessing.

Backsliding Leads to No More Progress

 

I want to talk for a bit about the subject of backsliding. I heard a preacher say recently that backsliding is not usually a blow out, it's a slow leak. However, both end in no more progress forward. In other words, it doesn't happen all at once. It starts with one step. It always begins in the heart as the above graphic states. 

Maybe it starts with "I don't feel like going to church today" or "I am going to skip my bible reading today" or "I don't want to go on visitation today" or "I don't have time to talk to them about Jesus right now". The heart issue comes into play when we give into these thoughts. Every time we give in, it becomes easier the next time. Just like lying gets easier each time. This goes on until we are out of the habit of doing right! 

Maybe it starts with "I miss my old way of life". If we start desiring old habits and ways of life, it becomes easier to justify not following God. Remember Lot's wife? She longed for her life in Sodom so much that she looked back one last time to see what she was giving up. Even though they were told not to look back and to keep running from there, she just couldn't move forward without regret. God turned her into a pillar of salt. He may not do that to you as a result of longing for a former sin or lifestyle before you got saved, but He may allow something else. Depression, discontentment, anger, disregard for God's Word, etc. can result from allowing these thoughts to take root and lead to action. Or should I say no action? Because that is where backsliding happens. We step back from where we once were. We step back little by little from what is right. In addictions we call that "falling off the wagon" or "relapsing". When this happens we stop moving forward. We not only stagnate where we are but actually go backwards at times. We stop reading our bible and praying and then we stop enjoying preaching, going to church or doing things around the church or with church family. 

Praise God! We don't have to stay in a backslidden condition! We just take one step, back in the right direction and God accepts us back! God forgives and we can then move forward. 

Hosea 11:7a - And my people are bent to backsliding from me; 

But...

Psalm 103:14 - For he knoweth our frame; he remembereth that we are but dust.

1 John 1:9 - If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 

Proverbs 28:13 - He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and foresaketh them shall have mercy. 

Let's do our best to keep stepping forward for God and not backslide into somewhere we don't want to end up. 

Have a blessed day. 

Quit Your Stinkin' Thinkin'!

We all know the power of words but thoughts are every bit as powerful! Politicians, media, and advertisers all know the power that words and thoughts have on people. Politicians use words to make campaign promises. The media and advertisers use words and imagery to play on our minds. Imagery and the use of the right words creates thoughts and thoughts have great power and control over people. 

Negative thoughts brings us to places we do not wish to necessarily go. Depression and sin are direct results of wrong thinking. Negative thoughts can also bring mental and physical harm to our bodies. 

The bible says in Proverbs 23:7a - For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: ...

Philippians 4:8 says Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there ban any praise, think on these things.

This gives a list of things that we should allow our minds to dwell on. Notice, they are all positive things! 

When we start allowing negative or any type of wrong thinking, we can get into trouble pretty quickly. That is why we need to do our best to nip it in the bud as soon as the negative thoughts start. In 1 Corinthians chapter 9 Paul talks about bringing his body into subjection so that he doesn't harm his preaching to others. We bring our bodies into subjection and alignment with God's Word by first controlling our thoughts.

Romans 12:2 says And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

Here's something to try when you start having stinkin thinkin. When a wrong or negative thought enters your mind, force yourself to stop and then think of (and even say out loud if you need to) 3 positive things. Something that makes you smile. Something that gives you peace in your heart. Anything that takes your mind from the stinky thoughts. 

Having a mindset shift or change of thought takes practice but can be done if you follow my little trick above. Where we allow our minds to dwell effects our lives in great ways. You can live in joy and peace or in fear, anxiety, resentment, anger or any other negative pattern. However, you will reap the consequences of those both in a troubled mind and illness ridden body. The choice is yours. 

Have a blessed day and hope I gave someone something to think about.

Like Vs Love

 

I got to hear my hubby preach recently and it inspired this post. Both love and like are important in a relationship. Quite frankly, "like" is harder to pull off than love. We are commanded in the bible to love others. However, we are not commanded to like them. We can love and show love because of God's commandment or because of respect for authority or whatever and still not like the person. Love is a choice. Like is not. Like is based on personality, character, and conduct. 

I have been sure for many years that my husband loves me. I have not always been sure he likes me; that he likes the person I am. He has tried to assure me that he does but there have still been doubts off and on. His love, however, has helped to push those other feelings aside. 

In relationships, especially marriages, hopefully both feelings exist. If both exist, the marriage has a better chance of lasting. 

As I said above, liking someone, in my opinion is harder to pull off. Loving someone chooses to ignore the faults and love anyway. Liking someone usually means you don't even see the faults. You only see the traits that draw you to them. Like sees nice, funny, quiet, loud, serious, responsible, caring, determination, bravery, opinionated, and the list goes on. Like is the true things talked about at a funeral or memorial service. It's the things that are "liked" about a person that generally make up a person's dash or journey in life. 

I hope to be someone that is generally liked as a person. Someone who is not talked negatively about when my name comes up or when I walk away from a group. Of course, you cannot be liked by every person and there will always be someone who you may rub the wrong way but hopefully there are more people in favor of you than that do not like being around you. Oh, yeah, if you like someone you absolutely love being around them! 

Just a little thought provoker. Have a blessed day! 😊

Truths from the Book of Ruth

 

I've heard a bunch of preaching on the book of Ruth and I don't mean to be contrary or stir up trouble but I don't see this book as many preachers do. Yes, it's a story about redemption and is an example of the redeeming story of us and Christ but there are many good things to take away from this book besides that.

I do my best not to speak emphatically where God is silent. I am not in agreement that Elimelech and Naomi were in sin against God for going to Moab. Shhh! Don't tell the commentators! There's no mention that God was upset with them for doing so. I believe Elimelech was doing his best to care for his family and since there was a famine in Judah, he went where he could provide for them. It said he went to sojourn in Moab so that means it was supposed to be temporary. We are not told in scripture how long Elimelech was there before he died. But, we DO know that Naomi and her sons stayed for about 10 years and that during that time the sons married women of Moab. We can not assume that just because Elimelech dies that it means God was punishing them for leaving Judah and not trusting in Him. Should we assume that God is punishing people just because someone dies?! No! Because death is a part of life due to the first sin! There are countless examples of God allowing death or of Him flat out killing someone because of their sin. In those cases we are plainly told in scripture. There is no indication that because they left they turned their backs on God. As a matter of fact, I venture to say that it was quite possible that they continued worshipping God all along faithfully and were witnesses to their daughters in law. Or if Elimelech died before the marriages then Naomi and her sons were the witnesses. Either way, I believe that Orpah and Ruth were following in the worship of God along with them. When Naomi tells Ruth after she convinces Orpah to return to her family, that she should follow her sister in law who has returned to her gods. At this point is when Ruth tells Naomi that where she goes, Ruth will go and that Naomi's people will be her people and Naomi's God will be her God. She was choosing to follow the God of heaven as she had learned to do. 

We know that Ruth and Orpah were kind to their husbands and to Naomi. When Naomi tells them to go back, she prays that God would deal kindly with them as they had with her and the dead (meaning her sons). She also prays that God give them each another husband so they can have rest. 

The three women obviously had a close relationship because the daughters in law didn't want to go back to their parents. They wept and argued to stay with Naomi. This says much about their relationship. Often mothers and daughter in laws do not get along yet they were willing to follow Naomi to another country and dwell with her rather than return to their own mothers. 

When Naomi and Ruth get back to Judah, Ruth immediately asks permission to go to the field and glean to provide for herself and Naomi. She trusts that someone will provide grace and allow her to glean. This shows her respect (she asked permission), care and dedication to her mother in law. What a beautiful example for us ladies! In chapter 2, we see how Ruth is a hard worker and also how humble she is by reverencing Boaz for allowing her to glean beside his maidens. She questions why he's showing such kindness and he says it is because she has been kind to Naomi and left her parents to follow her. He also prays God give her a full reward for learning to trust in Him. 

Ruth is eager to take advice from her mother in law. Naomi tells her how to approach Boaz so that he could be the redeeming kinsman for them both. One thing is for sure, in Old Testament times, blood took care of blood! It went out to any relation including what we call extended family. In today's world, most women do not want nor do they listen to their mother in law's advice. Actually, it is the cause of much friction! 

Then of course there is the whole story of Boaz redeeming Naomi and Ruth to himself as a picture of what Jesus did. Also, he takes Ruth as his wife and God blesses them with a baby boy named Obed. I love that Ruth who was not born a Jew, gets to be in the lineage of Christ. BTW, there is also Rahab the harlot in the lineage, too! God uses whom he will use and they don't all have to be perfect in action or bloodline.

The more I read the book of Ruth, the more I love it! God has definitely used if of late to speak to my heart about how to conduct myself. I hope this post gives you some golden nuggets of truth from this precious book.