The Love Bank

Not sure how this post will go. Mostly because I'm not sure how to explain the things heavy on my heart and mind but I'm going to try. 

In all relationships there is give and take. There is a constant deposit and with drawl from each person's internal love bank. This is true for every type of relationship...husband & wife, parent & child, friend to friend, and even in a sense employer & employee (tho this is not usually love or romantic in nature). Within all of these relationships there are investments made. - deposits made into an internal love bank. This can be done through words of encouragement such as "I love you", "I'm proud of you", "Great job" or "I'm here for you". It can also be done through deeds such as kisses, hugs, holding hands, doing a chore or other kindness, or rewards & awards. The point is that when we do one of the above or something similar, we make deposits into the other person's love bank. 

On the other hand, with drawls are made when an argument takes place, unkind & insensitive words are said, when ungrateful attitudes arise or when the deposits are withheld. Just as a checking or savings account can get overdrawn when there are too many with drawls and not enough deposits, it can also happen within relationships. Hurt comes. Forgiveness is easy when there have been more deposits than with drawls. 

If you leave the account depleted for too long the bank eventually closes the account. In relationships this is when trouble starts. It begins a vicious cycle that causes one or both people involved to quit trying. They stop trying or wanting to make deposits into the other person's love bank. I've seen this happen in every single one of the aforementioned relationships. In the business relationship it will cause friction in the work place and eventually lead to someone quitting or being fired. In friendships it causes anger, distrust, backbiting and a parting of ways. In parent/child relationships it can be very detrimental and have far reaching consequences even to several generations. Severe rebellion on part of the child can take place. There is often a parting of ways here, too. A child may refuse to be a part of the parent's life or allow their children to see the grandparent. In the marriage relationship it is also detrimental. Care of the other person stops. For the woman, she may stop taking care of the home or do anything for the husband such as cooking, cleaning, laundry or romantic areas. For the man, he may start spending more time at work, on the computer, in front of the tv or hanging with the guys and show little concern for the wife and her needs or desires. This leads to feelings being shut off. Affairs can take place because at the slightest attention from someone of the opposite sex suddenly feelings are then awakened. God made us social beings that long for companionship, for touch, and the need to feel wanted, desired and appreciated. 

All this can be avoided if there is consistent depositing into the love bank in all relationships. It is just a matter of being thoughtful and caring towards the other person. Yes! Even our children, parents, bosses, and employees. The marriage relationship is the most important of these however. 

I hope this will make anyone reading this to consider the truths I tried to bring forth. Keep love banks full with as many deposits as possible so that when an occasional with drawl must be made, it doesn't deplete the account and forgiveness can take place and amends made.