It is a scary time for many. It is an uncertain time for all of us. Who do I know that will contract the virus? Will I get it? How bad will it be? Will I recover if I do get it? Wondering what our country and the world will look like when the Covid-19 outbreak is over is on everyone's mind. Will the economy recover? Will our rights as citizens change? Will the government seize this time to implement government control of more areas of our lives? These are the type of questions many are allowing to run through their minds and be expressed on social media. It is fueled by fear and the uncertainty of the moment as the spread continues across the country and around the world. It is fueled also by false information and the constant barrage of media reports that never cease. The fear is also fueled by the unknown of the virus that seems to have changing information almost daily.
Times like this bring out the best in some people but the worst in others. Some are volunteering to help bring supplies to those who are vulnerable and can't get out. Some are considered essential workers and braving going to work everyday never sure if they will be exposed to the possibly deadly virus or spread it to someone else if they are exposed. Some CEOs are shutting down their productions and deciding to make ventilators, medical masks and hand sanitizer. Still there are those who are hoarding essentials so that those who truly need them can't get them. Some of those hoarders are turning around and selling those products at an inflated price for selfish greed. There are people yelling and complaining that store shelves are empty and blaming store workers and managers. There are those not practicing social distancing putting people at risk. There are people purposely coughing on produce and items at the store or directly on people thinking it's funny. Yep, it's the best of times and the worst of times as far as how people are responding.
For me, shelter in place orders brings more loneliness than I'd like. My husband is an essential worker. The past three months he has worked out of town and even out of state during the week, coming home on weekends. My kids are grown with families of their own in other states. I can't go visit church members right now. This leaves me with a bunch of time on my hands. Alone time. It has some perks, don't get me wrong. I have time to read and study my bible. I have time to read the two books I have started. However, my mind is racing at times trying to plan a mother/daughter banquet in May but struggle if I should even bother because who knows if we will be allowed to have gatherings by then? April begins tomorrow. It's a tough month for me. I practice being thankful and grateful every single day because if I don't I will get too down. I spend a lot of time in prayer. As I type this I am suddenly aware that while I am alone during the week, there are many who are alone all the time because of having lost a spouse. Under normal circumstances we can be out and about and carefree visiting stores or friends and other family members. But right now, with the potential spread of a virus that can possibly kill you, life gets lonely staying home.
If you are struggling too, use your phone, social media, computer, etc to stay connected to people. This was just a release for me. A way to keep boredom at bay.
The firsts in our lives have so much impact. Sometimes we don't even realize it until later just how much. Some firsts cause chills, thrills, excitement, fear, anxiety and overwhelming joy. You know the firsts I'm talking about. They include things like a first day of school, a first dance, a first date, a first kiss or the birth of your first child or the first time you hold any of your children. They can also include things like your first time driving or the first time you rode a roller coaster. As a child it may have been your first time riding a bike without training wheels or the first time you had a sleep over with a friend. It could be the first day you spent as a married person and the first meal you prepared for your husband. I remember being plenty nervous! Life is made up of firsts. When we recall these type of memories they bring back some of the same emotions and often a smile to our face.
With every first comes a teachable moment and change. First experiences teach us about our likes or dislikes and what we want to be different and or how to go about making it different. With every first comes change to our lives. These changes can be good or bad but either way life will be different from now on. There may be a new normal due to the type of firsts that cause pain, sadness, and hurt. Some of these firsts include the first day after a death of someone we love, the first time someone makes fun of you, the first time you and your spouse have a fight, the first day of a cancer diagnosis, the first time your child stops calling you mommy and prefers mom or the first day a child goes off to school and you no longer have the main influence during the day.
There is no doubt that life's firsts impact us beyond what we even imagine. These firsts get embedded in our brains and influence our emotions, actions and reactions. They have a profound influence on who we are and why we do the things we do or respond in the way we do to others.
Memories of any of our firsts can bring smiles or tears even years later. They can stir up emotions of joy, fear and even anger. The fact that years after a first, the memory can still produce such emotions is proof that firsts impact our lives more than we realize at the time.
Just wanted to share some thoughts on this topic. I suppose that there's really not much life application to this post but I hope that as you read some of your firsts were triggered in your mind and stirred some emotions you had forgotten. Maybe the point is today go out and have a FIRST experience that can bring a joyful memory in the future!
