It's been a few weeks since I have had a chance to post. Life has been super busy! Today I want to talk about traps that parents and grandparents fall into in their thinking. For the past 15 years or more, I've observed and even caught myself getting caught up in the fast pace, create grand experiences for the kids so everything is an adventure and fun and exciting. We think this needs to be done on a very regular basis. I'm not sure if it's because kids today are so easily bored because they have so much access to stimuli or if it's social media creating doubt and guilt in us so that we feel pressure to compete with what everyone else is doing. For me, I think it started maybe because I don't get to see my grandkids in person on a regular basis. Now that we have moved, that has changed with one set of kids.
What I want everyone who reads this to realize is that everyday doesn't have to be Disney World fun. Simple everyday time spent playing with them is every bit as important as these grand, exciting experiences. Kids today have so much that many of them don't even know what they want if you ask them an idea for a present. They all seem to need to be constantly entertained by the adults in their lives. All over social media memes go around telling us to not purchase toys or games or gifts but rather give gift cards to have experiences. In other words, get them passes to the theme park or movies or mini golf or zip lining, etc. Well, I think we may be doing a disservice to these kids by doing that. Sure, if they are children that have never gotten to go experience something fun like that, then by all means help them go have a great experience once in awhile. On the other hand, the more they experience, the more bored they become with life. They are going to always be looking for the next big exciting thing to do.
My own children didn't need me to play with them all the time. Neither did adults constantly need to entertain me. Making them play on their own forces them to use their imaginations and pushes their creativity. It makes them self-sufficient. Children are pretty resilient and will figure out how to get something done if allowed the time to do so. How do you think so many learn to build makeshift ladders to reach the candy or toy or game they want?
Now back to the grandiose experiences, I am almost 55 years old and when I look back on my life and my childhood the things I miss most are not the great experiences but the little everyday things. I miss playing with my cousins. I miss them. I miss spending time with them. The everyday fun we had has burned memories into my brain that I still long for. Yes, I have had some great experiences in my time, but those are not what comes to my mind first. We played more Army and S.W.A.T (using whiffle ball bats and sticks as guns!) and cowboys and Indians than any group of cousins alive. Of this I am sure! We played and we played hard! Life was great! We played every kind of ball imaginable and we made up games to play together. We played in the dirt and the mud and swam in the river and never felt we were deprived because life was so much fun! Playing anything together was fun! We had rope swings and tree houses and we also had grapevines to swing on, too! The girls played dress up and house and we played in a net hammock for hours! We went sledding in the winter, built snow forts, built forts and club houses out of cinder blocks, climbed trees, pretended to be in a singing band and sang at the top of our lungs. We spent tons of time in the woods and in the fields catching grass hoppers and having water fights and when my kids were young they got to do the same things. My point is, the movies, parks, theme parks, traveling to other states, zoos and zip lining experiences were few and far between. And guess what, those few experiences are not the things that I miss. They are not what I look back on and think made my growing up life awesome. It was the time spent living everyday with those I loved. I had great cousins on both sides of my family and both sides of my family were inner twined because my mom and her siblings grew up with my dad and his siblings. My mind is flooded with spending the night at my cousin's houses or with my grandparents. My life was full of love and laughter and I had no doubt I was loved even when I messed up. No one can ask for more than that!
Fun and laughter can come right at home in the house or in the yard! This is what makes a memorable life!
Just something to think about. I shared my heart and my past today. Hope it makes you think and is a blessing.
