Had this post idea rolling through my mind for several days but didn't have a chance to develop the thoughts into coherent ideas to put in type. It first stemmed from this thought...Life pushes you forward no matter how much you want it to stop for awhile. It has already been 6 weeks today since we closed our church. That doesn't seem possible. Staying busy has kept some of the mourning down. There was the packing and emptying of the church building along with decisions about where to attend church and serve until we see what God has planned for us. There was getting our house organized enough to bring stuff home from the church building. The new church we are serving in has had things quite active already with a ladies meeting, cooking for a funeral, two day soul winning class, and nursing home ministry one Sunday. Bob has also been a couple times with the pastor to visit some folks who had visited the church from our church. That doesn't even count getting a garden in, babysitting Amelia (my niece) and just daily life of living.
I thought that I was pretty much over the mourning process of losing our church but I don't think I fully am. I have been overly emotional this week. I know the old saying of staying busy ... especially for others when you are down or hurting and this is good advice. However, at some point you must deal with the loss you have experienced in order to move past it. People in general face so much loss in a lifetime (some more than others) that it is actually quite amazing at how well we as the emotional beings God created us to be, are able to adapt and move on. (now I know that there are some who struggle in this area and maybe don't deal and move on but most people do)
Loss doesn't have to be just the death of a loved one. Loss can be loss of a friendship, marriage, job, home, children growing up & leaving home, pet, reputation, honor, vehicle, health, mind, business, identity, vacation you thought you were taking, and the list can go on. Whatever the loss you may experience, at some point you must acknowledge it, mourn over it (for however long necessary), accept it and then move on forward in life somehow and someway. This is easiest when leaning on God for your strength and close loved ones, too. There may be times when you remember the loss after moving past it and the mourning may return for a time. Usually when it returns you are able to pull out of the slump and mourning faster than when it originally happened.
Either way, the above process still applies. It is ok to cry over the loss and wish it wasn't so but eventually you must dry the eyes, take a deep breath, accept what has happened and decide in your heart and mind to move on. You must take steps to get on with your life with the way God has allowed your life to be.
God knows what you are going through. He is there for you to lean on if you just do it. God knew Bob and I would start Rock Solid Baptist Church and that it would last 7 years and then He would move us somewhere else. We have decided that God was gracious in allowing us to even start the church to 1. Make a difference in lives in this area, 2. Gain experience we would not have gained in another way, 3. To be local and not out of state when my mom got sick with cancer. I don't believe I would have been able to handle that year and a half living 4 1/2 hours away from her and not helping in her care. That experience alone, has shaped and molded me forever for the future in ways that are too personal and too much to talk about now. Maybe someday another post will cover it.
So, like I said in the beginning...Life goes on ... Whether we want it to or not. Tonight the sun will set, and tomorrow morning the sun will rise...And hopefully so will I! ...Lord willing. Even though some days are hard, and I want to do nothing more than lay on the couch and cry; sooner or later I must get up and do and go on with life.
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